“If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are halfway through.”~ Alcoholics Anonymous p. 83-84
Thinking back on my time in treatment, it was the first time that I truly felt that I belonged. I had always felt alone – like I was experiencing life in a different way from everyone else. I never believed that other people could be going through what I was. I had no understanding that people with addictions come from all walks of life. I thought that I had to fix everything alone. I could not have been more wrong.
I drank for only a short period of time; from 18 to 21. In that time, I went from someone who drank with friends on the weekend to drinking daily. I would sit on the floor of my bathroom drinking and crying, wondering how I had gotten here and if I could ever change. Finally, I got my answer in the form of a hit and run car accident that I was responsible for and a trip to the ER where I was intubated for respiratory failure due to alcohol poisoning. Through this tragedy I was given the opportunity to change. I chose to accept the help that was offered to me, although I was not happy about it at the time. This decision changed my life forever. I was fortunate to go to residential treatment and to attend intensive outpatient treatment following my time in residential. I stayed in sober living for 6 months, formed relationships with women in recovery and my sponsor, worked the steps, and attended 12-step meetings. It was incredible to feel accepted and understood by the people around me.
After putting in some work I have achieved 5 years in recovery. Once a college dropout, I am about to receive my BA in Psychology in December. I am getting married, own a home, and have a good relationship with my family and friends. I continue to humble myself and accept that I am not able to recover alone. I am not unique and there are other people who struggle just like me. When I let these people into my life and allow them to help me, things only continue to get better. I am incredibly grateful for the life that I live today, it is truly beyond what I could have ever imagined. The promises have come true for me through the 12-steps, hard work, and accepting the help of others. I continue to be amazed by what has occurred in my life through recovery.