Surrender and acceptance is key to my program on a daily basis today, without it I think (KNOW) I’d drive myself crazy and more than likely lean toward a relapse. In the beginning of my recovery it was all about staying clean and not drinking or using drugs, which I thought was my only problem. I’ve come to realize that once I surrendered to acceptance, I accepted to surrender. I didn’t want to accept the fact that I’m an addict and that I have a problem. Once I accepted that FACT, I was able to surrender to the fact that I can’t put ANY mind or mood altering substance in my body, because for me…..one is too many and a thousand definitely never enough for this addict….of ANYTHING. When the urge to not use finally subsided, I started working on my program and working the Steps—finding out wherein the problem REALLY lies…….the mirror!
Today, when life shows up, things start to get to me, my stinkin’ thinkin’ keeps happening, 9 times outta 10 all I have to do is look in the mirror to find the problem. The good news is, when I look into the mirror, I’m also looking at the SOLUTION……if I surrender to the situation going on, accept it for what it is, and deal with it in the most positive way I can. If I can’t figure it out, then all I have to do is dig into my recovery tool box and start using the tools I’ve acquired over the past four years (My HP, sponsor, support group, literature, gratitude list, journaling or prayer and meditation). As long as I keep doing what I was taught and suggested, by the grace of God I will have four years on August 26th, 2012. The only way I can do that is to surrender to and accept whatever is thrown my way, on a daily basis……one day at a time! Every morning when I wake up and ask God for peace of mind throughout the day, I’m a newcomer to that day.