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Doing it My Way by Eugene “Tree” H.

So I kept coming in and out of the program relapsing, trying to decide what I needed to work on to stay sober.  What was I missing?  What didn’t I do last time?

I’d go to a meeting and hear someone share something good, where I thought maybe I was lacking, so I would think of plans to go about addressing that.  Then I’d go to another meeting and again hear something I thought was amazing, and “Voila!” another plan would start developing.  I’d read something and think, “That’s it, that’s what I need to work on.” My pride?  Or should I start with spirituality (start going to church)?  How about getting honest with myself more?

I really wanted to work on myself.  My efforts and thoughts were sincere.  I wanted to do it my way!!!  The Steps looked too simple and looked like a lot of work.  I didn’t realize it was not work, but a way of life, a way to live life on life’s terms, to live it happy, joyous, and free.

My sponsor gently said, “Stop trying to figure out what you were missing, or didn’t do the last relapse.  Just concentrate on the Steps, one by one, 1 through 12.  You’ll be amazed before you are halfway through.”

And I was.  Celebrating 17 years of sobriety, happy, joyous, and free!


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