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Thinking way too much, by John B.

Thinking way too much, by John B.

Hello. My name is John and I’m and alcoholic. My sobriety date is Oct 17, 1984 and I’m grateful to be sober today.

I understand that it’s very difficult getting sober, I really do. But staying sober? Dude, that’s the real work.

See, I don’t have this. I like to think I have this, but I do not.

Every day I fight against my desire to isolate, keep secrets, and my fear of and desire to avoid other people at all costs; my disease, in other words. As they say, my disease wants me dead, but it will settle for miserable.

If I give in to the thinking that staying home and isolating (my favorite hobby) is a good idea, then it’s only a matter of time until I decide that I DO have this! That I can handle it, that I don’t need meetings, or contact with my higher power, other people or the steps, etc; Of course, I do regularly try some controlled isolating! Only a good man’s fault, to be sure!

But today? Today I won!!  I beat my brain! I went to a meeting and, guess what? The topic was just exactly what I needed to hear today, and that’s why I’m grateful.

Speaking of gratitude? Well, that’s a whole ‘nother subject….

Peace out