One day at a time…this is a slogan that I have heard used in the rooms since I went to my first 12-step meeting almost 3 years ago. That being said, I did not fully understand the meaning of this slogan until recently.
There are times I feel extremely frustrated with my program. Why do I have to go to a meeting? Why do I have to call my sponsor? Why do I have to follow my food plan? Why do I have to make a network call and run my ideas by someone else first?
Well, first of all I should note that I do not HAVE to do any of these things. Taking these recovery actions are a choice. If I choose to not do these recovery actions there are dangerous consequences which my past has shown me very clearly. And secondly, these actions are not necessarily FOREVER actions…they are just for today.
My alcoholic mind likes to play games with me and say “Well, it is not actually just for today, you really are trying to stay sober, clean, and abstinent forever”. Which may be true…But I have no idea what is going to happen tomorrow, next week, next year or even later this afternoon! All I know is that in this very moment, right now, I am taking the necessary actions to stay sober and abstinent. That is all I have.
If I make forever promises I will surely relapse. That sounds very unmanageable. I heard once in a podcast from a recovering addict that after they had relapsed over and over again, they returned to the 12-step rooms and stopped asking “Why? Why? Why?” And just began saying, “Okay, Okay, Okay” to what was asked of them.
As I am reminded in meetings, the reasons for the illness’ presence are unimportant. And the reasons behind why the tools of the program work are also unimportant. I see that the program has worked for other people so today I am choosing to believe that the program can work for me too. Besides, these recovery actions are just for today. And I think I can manage that. Thank you God for TODAY!